Kali's Defense of the Tennis Ball (Being a Monologue on Standards, Civilization, and the Decline of Play)
Kali, a border collie of uncompromising standards, delivers a lofty defense of the tennis ball - the apex of canine recreation - and condemns every rope, plush animal, squeaky abomination, and inferior sphere offered in its place. A satirical monologue about taste, dignity, and the profound human failure to throw the correct ball.